Where Are My Keys?

Movies get under your skin. The best ones are the ones you’re ready to dismiss but keep crawling back into your subconscious like roadkill that isn’t quite dead.

Having watched and come to admire these slow-burns (storing them with the other good stuff in the wine cellar) it’s not always easy to distinguish the ones that may not have grabbed you immediately. But the film that will always be the paradigm for me is Night of the Living Dead.

Zombies became my favorite cinematic creatures in the early 1980s. Something about cannibalism at that time was extremely taboo… and just what a nerdy teenage boy needed to shock others and rebel against society’s norm… like all good teenagers should.

These days, of course, zombie cannibalism is available every Sunday night on AMC with The Walking Dead… a network cornerstone that used to be reserved for the likes of The Wonderful World of Disney, Lawrence Welk, and Hee Haw.

Zombies have lost their punch in some regards… the taboo one at least. It’s a concept I reflect upon obsessively that often leads me to other reasons why the sub-genre is so popular and appealing.

But that’s another blog post.

I saw Dawn of the Dead before Night of the Living Dead. It was before the film was available on video (circa 1982) and the only way to see it was as a “Midnight Movie” at the Kingston 4 in Knoxville, Tennessee. My “date” that evening was Kris Tetzlaff, who left abruptly at the movie’s start (when the afroed tenant bit chunks out of his wife’s tricep and shoulder), fleeing to the neighboring sanctuary of The Rocky Horror Picture Show or Monty Python and The Holy Grail.

Not me. I was riveted… and thus became my obsession with recently deceased cannibals.

Shortly after, I found Night of the Living Dead on videotape and was eager to recapture the breaking of my cerebral hymen AGAIN… this time from the comfort of my living room couch.

Not so much.

The print was grainy, the music was canned, the effects minimal, and most of the acting ridiculously amateur. How could this be a monument in history I wondered, when it left me feeling somewhat bored and deflated.

But then I couldn’t quit thinking about it. At night I would lie in bed and wonder… What if it happened right now? What would you do? Where would you go? Who would you align with? How would you survive?

That was the power of the movie… the concept. And clearly I wasn’t the only one because zombie-culture has inundated us ever since. The Italians vomited a slew of cheap knock-offs in the 1980s. Video games hit in the 90s. Rebirths and reinterpretations came in the new millennium with 28 Days Later, Shaun of the Dead, etc… all the way down to a weekly television show that has been on Sundays now for nearly a decade.

Did you notice I used the word zombie-culture?

I have digressed a little here. My point was to be about our concept… and why our podcast is called Johnny Has the Keys.

Some dude once said that Shakespeare wrote it all, and everything that followed was just a riff on something he had already written. This is not true. I can name several movies that do not remind me one iota of Shakespeare. Surf Nazis Must Die immediately comes to mind.

But the concept that dude suggested is completely valid: There is nothing out there that is one hundred percent original. Somewhere—whether it be externally (in the case of film production), or internally (in the case of writing)—there are key elements that a story was either influenced by, or perhaps went on to inspire others. Sometimes both. The parallels are limitless… motif, metaphor, structure, effects, social commentary, humor, creativity… past, present, and future.

Did you notice I used the word key?

So yeah, we took an abrupt and hilarious whisper straight from the lips of catatonic Barbara in Night of the Living Dead—“Johnny has the keys”—and made it our own metaphor for these little connections between works that nerds like me and David obsess over.

I know we’re not alone. Everyone likes finding their keys. It’s a tremendous relief.

Join us.

–Tim

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Friends Reunited

I met David Horton in 1978. We were teenagers, both cast in a community production of Carousel by the Morristown Theatre Guild in Tennessee. He was playing the villain, Jigger, and I was a dancer/chorus member. He was a little older than me and we didn’t become close friends until four years later…

Within one of these four years David found himself thrust into behind-the-scenes production on Sam Raimi’s The Evil Dead. The movie was filmed near my parent’s house in Morristown, on a mutual friend’s property. Of this affiliation, I will be eternally jealous.

In 1982 we were cast in Agatha Christie’s Ten Little Indians and what began a streak of several mutual productions over the next nine years (including One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Greater Tuna, Macbeth, and Little Shop of Horrors), many of which he was director. You can find these some of these here.

In that span, we easily consumed hundreds of movies, most of which were horror and science fiction. The final 2 years we shared a house and our movie intake likely tripled. People would come and go (talking of Michelangelo?) but we were the constant, always selecting the evening’s viewing entertainment from a vast collection of our own videotapes or rented oddities.

Other than writing and performing onstage, we worked with a local television station, skirted the fringes of movie production, staged charity events for the oldest community theatre in the state, drank tremendous amounts of alcohol, and still found time in the wee hours to watch tons of movies.

And though our opinions are not always bilateral, our obsession with the genres has been constant.

In 1989 I moved back to my home state of Georgia. David and I have probably not seen each other in person more than 5 times in the last thirty years. David since has married, has several children and grandchildren, and still works in the entertainment field. I came out of the closet, married, have several four-legged furry children, and work in retail management.

Through the magic of the internet and social media, we have found each other again. And, rather than keep our humble opinions to ourselves, we—much like the kids we once were—have decided to put a show on for you! We hope you enjoy our company as much as we enjoy each other’s.

–Tim

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Be Gentle – It’s My First Time

I must say, the thought of doing a podcast was something I had thought about, but never with any real conviction. I thought “that might be cool”, but then would remind myself I also think it would be cool to be an astronaut. Having a podcast to me was like all of those “Youtubers” – there’s a video out there for everything from changing the brakes on your car to creating a tiny kitchen out of Play-doh. And, even though I may watch a variety of videos, I never thought of doing one myself. In fact, I am constantly mystified that people actually have the time and resources to create this plethora of video information. I mean it’s one thing to know how to do something. It’s another entirely to get he camera, shoot it, edit it, add titles and music and post it – let alone creating the Youtube page, doing any kind of marketing or tagging or whatever you have to do to get it out there. That’s a commitment. I always thought – “I don’t think I have that commitment for something that is about me.” But I was drawn to the idea. I’ve always been a person with lots of opinions about entertainment – especially movies, television and books. Friends used to talk about my “soap-boxing” – standing at parties or gatherings and just “going off” on something I was passionate about – sometimes for hours. So having opinions and talking has never been an issue. Did I ever have something worthwhile to say? Something that might even remotely be interesting to anyone else? Usually not. I mean, I had my opinion and I think I could debate that opinion fairly strongly. But was it important? Did it make a difference? Nah.

But a couple of years ago I started listening to a few podcasts. Usually ones that were reviewing movies or tc shows I was interested in. I wanted to see what others thought – if they agreed with me – or if they didn’t – why? Some of them were good – very professional and slick. Others were more like a couple of friends (or sadly only one lonely guy) sitting in a basement trying to feel important. Still others were so over-produced and spent so much time either stroking themselves or reading ad and sponsor copies the the entire thing was a waste of time.

Still I listened in and followed a few. The idea crept back in that – maybe i should try my hand at it. If so many other were sharing opinions, and I had a lot of opinions – maybe I should add my voice. This idea was usually drowned out by more pressing matters – family, work, the latest sci-fi series I could fine, etc. And then I heard from an old friend: “Hey, do you listen to podcasts?”

“Sometimes. Why?”

“You know, we should do that shit. I think we’d be great.”

And thus began the initial foray into making this podcast…….

Tune in next time as the idea starts to take shape.

–David

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